Ohh, I know how tempting it is; you’re cut off on the way to Grandma’s house by some lunatic in a Camero, you get a nasty phone call from a solicitor or bill collector, your spouse tracks in muddy snow that turns out to be something other than mud… I’m constantly reminding my husband, “Language!”—especially when we’re in the car!—though I’m sometimes guilty myself.

Even for grownups, it can be difficult to not call people names sometimes. We can use this side of our humanness to teach our children that yes, we, too, make mistakes, and we are sorry when we do so. It’s good for them to see Mommy and Daddy slip up once in a while and then atone for it; that way, they don’t feel so bad when they make mistakes and grow from them, too.

That said, it’s still important for us to at least try to not insult others. It’s petty and useless for the most part, and even if we temporarily feel better, the world certainly hasn’t changed for the better because of it. Here are a few ways to help curb the name-calling in your neck of the woods.

Pay Up: Have a name-calling jar in the home where everyone has to deposit a quarter for calling someone a name. My sixth grade teacher had us do this every time we said anything hurtful, including “shut up.” This made us extra careful, and when it was full she would use it to buy something for the class. If you’re afraid this might provide an incentive for your family to name-call more often, just use the money for something practical for the family, such as a new bath mat or towels.

Call Each Other Silly Names: Just for the week, have a rule that if you call someone a name, it has to be a silly name—ice cream, dictionary, juice box—or a positive name—superstar, sugar bear, gorgeous. If it doesn’t dilute tension and make everyone laugh, at least it will make the other person feel good! That alone will defeat the purpose of name-calling in the first place, hopefully turning you and your family off of it by default.

Enforce Sporty Punishments: I’m not much of a fan of punishments in general, but this might be fun for the family as well as helpful: when someone calls someone else a name, have him or her do push-ups, run a lap or two, do some sit-ups, etc. This would also work well if you’re working towards a family fitness resolution.